Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Two years from then

Like I said in my other post, Im new to all this.  But I have heard that writing things down and letting everything out really helps....so here I go.
 Two years ago...wow that seems like such a long time ago....so much has happened in that short time.  
I have always been the type of person who trusts VERY easily.  I am the type of person that if you need help, no matter who you are, if you are my "enemy", I will do everything that I possibly can to help you. But that backfired on me in June of 09.  I met this guy named Andy.  He seemed like such a good guy ...then I found out the truth.
We went out a couple of times, and hooked up.  Then one night we were talking and he was telling me about how he was on his way home from a "work" trip from Colorado.  He was falling asleep on the phone (while driving), so I offered to let him come over to my house, well my parents house, and stay.  He got there a few hours later.  My parents were out of town on a camping trip, I couldnt go because of work. Stupid me let him talk me into running up the street to get food while he "took a shower". When I got back to the house, I should have known something was off because I had been gone like 15 mins and he still hadn't gotten in the shower.  When I walked into the bathroom, he was just starting to shave.  Well, that night he threw clothes in the washer and then dried them, then we went to bed.  The next morning we got up and I went to work and he followed me out.  Well, nothing happened for a few days ( I didnt hear from him either), then on Sunday morning a lady from Kmart called the houseat like 6am. My parents had gotten home late the night before. The next thing i know my dad is screaming for me to come to the living room.  I lied and told them that the only people tht had come over to the house while they were gone were my best friend Bekah and her boyfriend.  I did have Bekah over but the guy was an ex of mine that had come over and I thought from the description the lady gave us that it was him. My dad, me and my sister Lisa all went to Kmart that morning and watched the video.  When we saw that it was Andy I pretty much fainted.  I had to tell my parents everything and when we got back to the house we started looking through everything and found out that we had 3 credit cards stolen, a checkbook with 25 checks in it, and over $1000 worth of jewlery.  He had also taken some of my pain killers that I had for my knee.  My parents called the police and I had to give the description and tell them where he lived, i didnt know the address so i gave them the directions.  About a week later they called me and told me that they couldnt go to the house without the address and they wanted me to drive over there and get the address. I didnt want to because I knew that he knew my car, so my parents took their car over there with my sister since she knew where he lived.  They arrested him and he is in jail now, but he is probably going to get out soon.  My mom still brings all of that up every time i see her.  It really hurts me because I was just trying to help him, I didnt know that everything he had told me was a complete effin lie. 
About 2 weeks after that, I met Chris.  I fell for him HARD and he ended up breaking up with me for his ex wife. 
Then on July 23, 2008, I met Joshua Arnold.  I knew from the minute I saw him that I would end up marrying him.  He ended up asking me out on a date on the 27th.  From that day on we were pretty much inseperable.  He asked me to marry on October 20th.  We set the date for Valentines Day and started the rest of the planning.  I found my dress and picked the church, got the preacher and  sent out invitations.  Then about 3 days before the wedding, we found out that our preacher was going to have to have emergency surgery on that day so we had to find another preacher.  We ended up getting the pastor that married his parents.  We have a great marriage, but there are so many times when i want to just walk away and never turn back.  He is a great husband, but he has a bad drinking problem.  He will go and buy alcohol and wait till i fall asleep at night and get drunk and then the next day he is so hungover he cant do anything.  There have been times where he will still be drunk when he gets up for work and I will have to take him because he cant drive. 
Now my sister (well best friend really...we basically adopted her when we were in 8th grade) is pregnant and my mom is soo excited about having her first "grandchild".  But if I say anything about having a baby she gets so mad and tells me, basically, that i am NOT having a baby.  I don't understand why she acts like this.  I am her daughter!!!  MY child will be her grandchild. She has ALWAYS treated Lisa better, she would take her shopping and just leave me at home then when I asked to go along she would make up something for me to do.  She has always told me that Im fat and that I would never find anyone who was going to love me...that she was going to have to take care of me for the rest of her life, and ask me why i couldnt be more like lisa. When Josh came into my life, she acted like he wasnt apart of my life, until the day we got married.
Well, I do feel better, lol...so much for now!!!  

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